Three blokes are talking...a 60 year old man, a 70 year old man and an 80 year old man.
"Sixty is the worst age to be," said the 60-year-old man. "You always feel like you have to pee and most of the time you stand there and nothing comes out."
"Ah, that's nothin," said the 70-year-old. "When you're seventy, you don't have a bowel movement any more. You take laxatives, eat bran, sit on the toilet all day and nothin' comes out!"
"Actually," said the 80-year -old, "Eighty is the worst age of all."
"Do you have trouble peeing, too?" asked the 60-year old.
"No, not really I pee every morning at 6:00. I pee like a racehorse on a flat rock; no problem at all."
"So, do you have a problem with your bowel movement?"
"No, I have one every morning at 6:30."
With great exasperation, the 60-year-old said, "Let me get this straight. You pee every morning at 6:00 and have a movement every morning at 6:30. So what's so bad about being 80?"
There's 3 blokes at a business convention talking about bad experiences in different countries.
The first one says "I ate a curry in India, and it wasn't cooked properly. I was in hospital for 2 days!
The second one replies " I ate fried chicken in America that wasn't cooked properly. 2 weeks I was in hospital!"
The third one chips in his comment. "I ate chow mein in china that wasn't cooked properly. 2 months!"
A bloke who was clearly eavesdropping walks over. "I couldn't help but overhear your conversation," he says, "I ate something so bad, that it's still messing with me. After 47 years!"
The men are bewildered. "What is it? What is it?" they all ask.
